Dating in Islam

Assalam o allaikum Br. Rizwan,

Based on our conversation last night, I have collected some references for you.

Dating in Islam:

Dating as explained by the western culture is the courtship of a single man and a woman who spend time together to know eachother before making a decision to marry eachother. Some muslims have also taken an excuse out of this practice by saying that one should know with whom he or she is going to get married and to know about the future spouse they resort to the concept dating.

First of all we see what Allah SWT has said about what is being lawful in this case.

الْيَوْمَ أُحِلَّ لَكُمُ الطَّيِّبَاتُ وَطَعَامُ الَّذِينَ أُوتُواْ الْكِتَابَ حِلٌّ لَّكُمْ وَطَعَامُكُمْ حِلُّ لَّهُمْ وَالْمُحْصَنَاتُ مِنَ الْمُؤْمِنَاتِ وَالْمُحْصَنَاتُ مِنَ الَّذِينَ أُوتُواْ الْكِتَابَ مِن قَبْلِكُمْ إِذَا آتَيْتُمُوهُنَّ أُجُورَهُنَّ مُحْصِنِينَ غَيْرَ مُسَافِحِينَ وَلاَ مُتَّخِذِي أَخْدَانٍ وَمَن يَكْفُرْ بِالإِيمَانِ فَقَدْ حَبِطَ عَمَلُهُ وَهُوَ فِي الآخِرَةِ مِنَ الْخَاسِرِينَ

Translation:

Made lawful to you this day are At­Tayyibât [all kinds of Halâl (lawful) foods, which Allâh has made lawful (meat of slaughtered eatable animals, etc., milk products, fats, vegetables and fruits, etc.). The food (slaughtered cattle, eatable animals, etc.) of the people of the Scripture (Jews and Christians) is lawful to you and yours is lawful to them. ( Lawful to you in marriage) are chaste women from the believers and chaste women from those who were given the Scripture (Jews and Christians) before your time, when you have given their due Mahr (bridal money given by the husband to his wife at the time of marriage), desiring chastity ( i.e. taking them in legal wedlock) not committing illegal sexual intercourse, nor taking them as girl-friends. And whosoever disbelieves in the Oneness of Allâh and in all the other Articles of Faith [ i.e. His (Allâh's), Angels, His Holy Books, His Messengers, the Day of Resurrection and Al­Qadar (Divine Preordainments)], then fruitless is his work, and in the Hereafter he will be among the losers. (Al - Maidah: Ayah 5)

So it is very clear that Allah SWT has prohibited us to be in companionship with people secretly without having a wedlock.

Regarding our culture in Pakistan, we have these evils creeping into our muslim homes as well where people are interpreting Islam in whichever way they deem fit to fulfil their desires but we do not have to go far to get our answers. We just have to see what Prophet SAW said about a practice of being alone with a woman.

Prohibition of being alone with a non-mahram woman:

Ibn Juraij narrated this hadith with the same chain of transmitters, but he made no mention of it:" No person should be alone with a woman except when there is a mahram with her."
Sahih Muslim 3112

Ibn 'Abbas (Allaah be pleased with them) reported: I heard Allaah's Messenger (sallAllaahu alayhi wa sallam) delivering a sermon and making this observation:" No person should be alone with a woman except when there is a mahram with her, and the woman should not undertake journey except with a mahram." A person stood up and said: Allaah's Messenger, my wife has set out for pilgrimage, whereas I am enlisted to fight in such and such battle, whereupon he said:" You go and perform Hajj with your wife."
Sahih Muslim 3110

Prophet SAW said, "Whenever a man is alone with a woman, Satan is the third among them"

At-Tirmidhi

There are many other ahadeeth that give the daleel that its not allowed to be alone with a non-mahram woman. Allah SWT gives a clear commandment to us in Quran regarding our ettiquettes when we see a non-mahram man or a woman.

The following ayah is a direct commandment to the men for their behaviour.

قُل لِّلْمُؤْمِنِينَ يَغُضُّوا مِنْ أَبْصَارِهِمْ وَيَحْفَظُوا فُرُوجَهُمْ ذَلِكَ أَزْكَى لَهُمْ إِنَّ اللَّهَ خَبِيرٌ بِمَا يَصْنَعُونَ (24:30)
Translation:

Tell the believing men to lower their gaze (from looking at forbidden things), and protect their private parts (from illegal sexual acts, etc.). That is purer for them. Verily, Allâh is All-Aware of what they do.

Below is the ayah that is very mufassil about the behaviour of the muslim women and see that Allah SWT has commanded again for the muslim women to lower their gaze as well.

وَقُل لِّلْمُؤْمِنَاتِ يَغْضُضْنَ مِنْ أَبْصَارِهِنَّ وَيَحْفَظْنَ فُرُوجَهُنَّ وَلَا يُبْدِينَ زِينَتَهُنَّ إِلَّا مَا ظَهَرَ مِنْهَا وَلْيَضْرِبْنَ بِخُمُرِهِنَّ عَلَى جُيُوبِهِنَّ وَلَا يُبْدِينَ زِينَتَهُنَّ إِلَّا لِبُعُولَتِهِنَّ أَوْ آبَائِهِنَّ أَوْ آبَاء بُعُولَتِهِنَّ أَوْ أَبْنَائِهِنَّ أَوْ أَبْنَاء بُعُولَتِهِنَّ أَوْ إِخْوَانِهِنَّ أَوْ بَنِي إِخْوَانِهِنَّ أَوْ بَنِي أَخَوَاتِهِنَّ أَوْ نِسَائِهِنَّ أَوْ مَا مَلَكَتْ أَيْمَانُهُنَّ أَوِ التَّابِعِينَ غَيْرِ أُوْلِي الْإِرْبَةِ مِنَ الرِّجَالِ أَوِ الطِّفْلِ الَّذِينَ لَمْ يَظْهَرُوا عَلَى عَوْرَاتِ النِّسَاء وَلَا يَضْرِبْنَ بِأَرْجُلِهِنَّ لِيُعْلَمَ مَا يُخْفِينَ مِن زِينَتِهِنَّ وَتُوبُوا إِلَى اللَّهِ جَمِيعًا أَيُّهَا الْمُؤْمِنُونَ لَعَلَّكُمْ تُفْلِحُونَ

Translation:

And tell the believing women to lower their gaze (from looking at forbidden things), and protect their private parts (from illegal sexual acts, etc.) and not to show off their adornment except only that which is apparent (like palms of hands or one eye or both eyes for necessity to see the way, or outer dress like veil, gloves, head-cover, apron, etc.), and to draw their veils all over Juyubihinna (i.e. their bodies, faces, necks and bosoms, etc.) and not to reveal their adornment except to their husbands, their fathers, their husband's fathers, their sons, their husband's sons, their brothers or their brother's sons, or their sister's sons, or their (Muslim) women ( i.e. their sisters in Islâm), or the (female) slaves whom their right hands possess, or old male servants who lack vigour, or small children who have no sense of the shame of sex. And let them not stamp their feet so as to reveal what they hide of their adornment. And all of you beg Allâh to forgive you all, O believers, that you may be successful.

Permissibility to see one's future Spouse:

Now, then what is that permissibility that is often talked about that Islam allowes a person to see the prospective spouse before marriage?

Following is the criteria that Prophet SAW put forth when a man looks for a spouse.

Abu Hurairah related that the Prophet Muhammad said: "Men choose women for four reasons: for their money, for their rank, for their beauty and for their religion, but marry one who is religious and you will succeed.

Bukhari, Muslim.

Although Prophet SAW categorically mentioned that one should choose a spouse based on her religion, the other three things mentioned also needs some consideration. For example, it is not prohibited to marry a woman based on her beauty, it will not be the best choice (as the best choice should be based on her understanding of the deen), but none the less it is not prohibited.

Also, apart from this, there are evidences, where Prophet Mohammad SAW has encouraged the people to see whom they will marry. This is because the physical attraction is a factor that will keep both the man and the woman to be away from the wrong doing and if their mutual attraction is strong, then they are less prone to commit sins.

Once a sahabi told Rasulallah SAW that he was going to get married. Prophet SAW asked him if he had seen the woman. When the man said no, Prophet SAW said, "Go and look at her for it is more likely to develope love between the two of you."

Sunan Ahmad

Prophet SAW also said, "If one of you proposes to a woman and if he is able to look at of her that which motivates him to marry her, let him do so."

Sunan Abu Dawud

There are some key aspects of consideration regarding this looking of the man or woman before marriage. Scholars are divided on the point whether it is sunnah to look at the future spouse or whether it is something that is merely permissible. However in either case, it is something that is lawful.

Also these ahadeeth do not mean that they allow the women to abrogate their limits of Hijab. Even in this looking she should be well covered in Hijab except face and hands. Since it is a special condition of looking for the purpose of marriage proposal, it is allowed for both the man and the woman to take a good look at eachother. If it were any other occasion, they would be averting their eyes from eachother after the first glance and lower their gaze, just as it is explained in the ayah above.

Regarding conversation between the man and the woman in this case is not permissible according to majority of the scholars. The scholars agree based on the above ahadeeth that although it is allowed to see the prospective spouse for their beauty and physical appearance, conversation about various matters is not allowed. The maharim of the woman must be present in this meeting. If there is anything that needs to be known by either one of them, they should find that out through their walis (guardians/parents).

From the above, it can be understood that those muslims who seek an excuse from the ahadeeth of Rasulallah that it is allowed to freely mix with the opposite sex in order to know them better for a possibility of marriage, is not correct and is prohibited.

If there are any particular questions that you might have, please feel free to ask.

Wassalam

ابو حلیمۃ

Seafood - Which seafood is halal?

Question:
Assalamu-Alaikum Brother Nasir,
Sorry to bother you.
i have a question regarding which sea food is halal. i have got many references from different sources but they conflict. i am specifically being askedfor these sea food:
- Octopus-
Crab-
Clam-
Oysters-
Shell-
Fish-
Scallop-
Squid

According to quran sea-food is halal (except eel) but then different imams givedifferent reasonings about which ones are halal and which ones are not. can you provideme with any reference or source/information from where i can precisely find which onesare halal?

Thanks for your help

:-:

Answer:

Assalam o allaikum Brother,

May you be in the best of health and imaan.. amiin.

When I was in university a few years ago, I faced a similar problem as to how to know what is halal for me when it came to sea food. It is true that when you look at Quran it is very much simplified ( or so it seems) that seafood in general is made halal but when you look at the opinions of the scholars, you find that there is a difference of opinion.

Now, one should bear in mind that when we talk about Aimma-Mujtahideen, the imams of the 4 madhabs, we should keep in mind that they were all mujtahids ( their opinions are highly revered), and so an opinion coming from them has to have a strong reasoning behind it. I am not an expert on all madahibs, neither do I know the dalaail (reasonings) of the verdicts from all madaahibs however, I have learnt from ulema who follow the hanafi madhab. So I can only give you information based on this school of thought. It is also noteworthy that one should adhere to one school of thought for all the problems since every school of thought has a strong base of principles of jurisprudence that determines the validity and invalidity of certain actions.

I have read that other schools, shafii, maliki and hanbali are laxed on this particular issue where they regard most of the creatures of the ocean to be halal including fish. The view in Hanafi scholarship is very much restricted, so much so that Hanafi school of thought only allows fish to be consumed from the sea. All other creatures like crabs, prawns, etc. are considered non-halal creatures. Now ofcourse there is a daleel (reasoning) for this verdict in Hanafi school of thought.

Let's see the ayah that talks about seafood ( or shall I say, the ayah that is given as a proof that all sea-creatures are allowed for consumption):

أُحِلَّ لَكُمْ صَيْدُ الْبَحْرِ وَطَعَامُهُ مَتَاعًا لَّكُمْ وَلِلسَّيَّارَةِ وَحُرِّمَ عَلَيْكُمْ صَيْدُ الْبَرِّ مَا دُمْتُمْ حُرُمًا وَاتَّقُواْ اللّهَ الَّذِيَ إِلَيْهِ تُحْشَرُونَ
Translation: Lawful to you is the pursuit of water-game and its use for food,- for the benefit of yourselves and those who travel; but forbidden is the pursuit of land-game;- as long as ye are in the sacred precincts or in pilgrim garb. And fear Allah, to Whom ye shall be gathered back. (Abdullah Yusuf Ali)

Based on this ayah, it is usually interpreted that Allah SWT has made all creatures in the ocean halal. The words that are used '...Sayd ul Bahr Wa Ta'aamuhu' which means 'Lawful is made unto you hunting in sea and its food...'.

SAYD UL BAHR
Sayd can be translated in two different forms - Literally meaning hunting or figuratively meaning hunted animal.

So if we try to translate ayah based on these two meanings we will get:
1)Lawful is made for you sea-hunting and its food. (literal)
2) Lawful is made for you sea-animal and sea-food. (figurative)

In the usool of fiqh, one cannot abandon the literal meaning at the expense of a figurative meaning without a valid daleel. In this particular case, scholars of Hanafi school have adhered to the literal meaning, that is 'Lawful is made for you sea-hunting and its food'.

The reason for adhering to the literal meaning is because of the second part of the ayah. The meaning of the complete ayah is:

Translation (5:96):
Lawful to you is (the pursuit of) water game and its use for food – for the benefit of yourselves and those who travel, but forbidden is (the pursuit of) land game as long as you are in a state of Ihrâm (for Hajj or 'Umrah). And fear Allâh to Whom you shall be gathered back.

It should be noted that this ayah is talking about the people who are in Ahraam ( Pilgrimage garb) and Shariah decrees that during the state of ahraam, one is permissible to hunt in the sea while it is unlawful to hunt on the land and therefore we see in the ayah that the context of Saydul Bahr (hunting in sea) flows into the context of Saydul Barr (hunting on land) and the meaning of the ayah becomes:

Hunting of sea animals is halaal for a muhrim (one in ahraam) while hunting of wild animals on land is unlawful for him.

If we take the figurative meaning, the meaning of the ayah will become:

Sea-animals are halaal for a muhrim while wild animals on land are unlawful to him.

But this is not true. We know that a person in ahraam is allowed to eat the halal wild animal meat as long as he has not hunted that animal himself or was not involved in hunting or catching the animal. This proves that we ought to stick with the literal meaning in this ayah and not the figurative (or interpreted) meaning.

WA TA'AAMUHU

Wa Ta'aamuhu - meaning its food.

We read and hear that when it is said 'its food' , it means all the creatures in the ocean and not just the fish. To support this argument, often a hadeeth is quoted from Rasulallah SAW that:
'It's (the ocean's) water is pure and its carrion (the dead) are halaal."

Based on this hadeeth it is said that anything that is found in sea is halaal for us. But if one sees the hadeeth of the Rasulallah SAW where he specifically mentions the carrions being halaal for us, one would see that infact here carrion means only fish.

Rasulallah SAW is reported to have said:
"Two carrions are made Halaal for us; Fish and Locust" [ Mishkaat Vol 2: P361]

It means that fish and locust are the only two animals/insects that do not need to be slaughtered. So Rasulallah SAW gave us the explanation of the carrion being halaal restricted only to fish and not the sea animals in general.

Another hadeeth that is often quoted to prove that all animals in sea are halaal is:

"Everything in ocean is Madhbooh (slaughtered)." [Bukhari]

In the book Fathul Bari, we see with strong chains of narrations that Umar RA and Ali RA said:
"All fish are slaughtered already by Allah SWT"

So again it was clarified by the Sahaba that when it came to understanding of lawful from sea, it was only fish that was meant as lawful.

Wallahualam.

Note: The references for this article are from the fatwas of Mufti Ebrahim Desai , Madrassah Innamiyah, South Africa.

Jumma Salaat in a Multifaith room

The following question was asked from Mufti Ebrahim Desai regarding the permissibility of Jummua Salaat in multi-faith rooms that are usually found in universities, hospitals and airports.

Question: Is it permissible to pray Salaatul Jummua in a multi-faith rooms which are shared with people of other faith groups. Also, please note that the multi-faith room in our university is not open during the semester break.
[The original explanation of the situation was very lengthy but above is a summary of what was asked]

Answer:
Muhtaram ,
Assalaamu `alaykum waRahmatullahi Wabarakatoh
In the name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful
1) It is permissible to conduct Jumma in a Musallah that is not used frequently for Salaah or is closed for some time of the year.

2) It is makruh to pray If there is a statue or picture in front of someone. However The Karaha falls off if it is hidden or in back of the musallee. This praying in a multifaith room with cross or statue will be permissible provided one covers them with a cloth. The issue is that of making their ta’zeem while prayer.

And Allah knows best

Wassalam

Consulted with
Mufti Ebrahim Desai & Mufti Emran Vawda
Darul Iftaa, Madrassah In'aamiyyah

Fatwa on Dr. Farhat Hashmi

Fatwa on Babar Choudhry of Ar-Rahman Ar-Raheem